Friday, June 13, 2008

I'm not a crier. Really. Step on my toe and I'm more likely going to cuss a blue streak and punch you in the eye than cry.

So why was I sitting in my bed at 4 am this morning sobbing like a baby? Damn nerves. My back, specifically the area where my ribs attach to my spinal column was out. Which sends "phantom" (where phantom=sticking a knife in my ribs and twisting it) pains around to the front of my ribs. It feels exactly like a broken rib and the pains are your bodies warning to not draw to large of a breath to protect said broken rib.
Only my ribs?
NOT broken.

The sad part of all this is I'm so congested right now that I am having a hard time drawing a deep breath normally. Now. Add to that a knife like shooting pain every time you draw half a breath.

SO first thing this morning I went to the chiropractor and he put me back together again. The ribs will probably go out again. The headache is probably from stress and the ear? This damn ear that's been "plugged" for 2 weeks? He got it to pop! It stayed that way for a while, but has since plugged and unplugged a few times.

So... ribs aren't hurting as bad.
Blood pressure is through the fricking roof.
Lungs are topped off with crap.
Head is hurting and "thick".

It's sunny and nice outside.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

That cold I was complaining about. Is.totally.kicking.my.ass.

I'm more than a little relieved that my Friday job cancelled. Ok don't tell, but I'm like THANK FUCKING GOD they canceled. My new best friend is my oxygen machine. I'm like tied to the damn thing and not in a good way ya know?

If my line gets hooked on my chair one more time and I almost rip off my nose, I might cry.

My lungs sound like an old geezers battle zone. With all the wheezing and popping and gurgling going on in there you'd think I was percolating. *Ding* Coffee's done.

I have a really sick goat and I don't give a damn. No no it's not that I REALLY don't give a damn, it's that I can't muster the energy to care. I DID something about it, I gave G a fatty shot and said, "here stick her with *cough*wheeze*hack* this and put some *hack*wheeze* hay in with....... *gasp for air*wheeze*wheeze*wheeze* her." Shit. It takes me like 3 minutes to finish a damn sentence if I get worn out first. And by wearing me out, that means walking more than 5' or coughing more than oh, twice.

So yeah, tomorrow, after running to get some milk for the babies, I'm sitting here on my machine and doing nada. Maybe a little nothing, but that will be pretty much it. If I can have my way that is.

So tomorrow will be the day the fence will fall down, the goat will get sick, the roof will blow off, the water will break, the barn will catch fire (again) and Bill will get hurt at work.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

I am entirely too tired. I'm sitting here with my sweats on my lap rather than putting them on because standing up just sounds like too much work.

It took an hour for them to wash up tonight. An hour. Which means I couldn't even start to break down until 6:45. Alone. Well, with G. But we usually have an abundance of help there, at least 4 guys come to help us tear down. Now, since we're starting milking at the new brilliant hour of 10:50 AM the chore guys aren't done in time to help tear down. Grrrreeeaaattttttt. Bleh. Then off to milk the goats and feed the babies entirely too little milk.

We got allll the way home and realized we were out of dog food, still.

Crap.

Monday, June 9, 2008

I am so glad that show is over. I'm thinking more and more that I just dislike showing. I like hanging out and watching and seeing people and people watching, but ehhh the rest, no mater how well or poor we do, I just don't care.

I was so glad we were able to haul out early on Sunday. We did not stay to show our bucks, because really? What was the point. Half the togg bucks went home before me and I only entered my buck to make them official anyway. Next year, nope, not happening.

Today I soundly hit a wall and feel like crap. The crap in my lungs is like dried rubber cement and I'm sitting here on my o2 already. The antibiotics seem to be doing nothing right now either.

Tomorrow I work at 11 am. I have to be there at 9am to set up. I hope I can hold my shit together through the day. So today is a day of rest.

I'm weak and dreary enough that I just want to close my eyes and stop breathing. Literally that's what my mind is telling me it needs. Umm... NO.

We did take all the kids from here out to the goat property. I need to move some of these weanable kids. But that means making a phone call and I just don't have the energy for that right now.