Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Slightly Juvenile

So tonight while running into Fortuna to grab dinner this white car sounding like a lawnmower pulled up next to me at a light and reved his motor. I'm thinking... WTH? Do you not see I'm in an SUV for god's sake, and a small one at that? Is your self esteem THAT low? But whatever baby, mama's feeling alright and no lawnmower is about to beat me off the line so bring it, beeotch. I look over at my 12 year old son and say, Ha dude wants to race. And he says, Mom, he's so going to take you with his Big Mexican Woman (his terms for a BMW).

Guess who won?

Not the little white lawnmower.

Ha. When he pulled back along side of me I wonder what he thought when he looked over and realized he'd been beat by an OLD person. Muuwwaaahahah. An old person in a jimmy with a 6cly. HA HA HA. Pfft. Lawnmower.

On a total other note.

Why do some gay men talk like they are? I mean, I don't think their voice would normally be so high pitched, and really, even if it was, who adds all those S's and Phhtttt's to their words. It reminded me of someone talking to a baby in baby talk. Awwsss arrenn't youss soo sweetss. Shhesh I can't even recreate it. And it drives me nuts. Dude I don't care one bit that your gay. Your boyfriend was hot, go you! But dude, stop talking like that. It's soooo unattractive. It's not nasal, it's not horse, so it doesn't seem to be a physical reason, it's like, it's like your TRYING to sound gay. It's the voice comedians use to "talk" like a gay man.

STOP IT. Just don't do it. Find your real voice. Use it. You'd be much easier to converse with. My brain does not switch into "translate baby talk mode" very fast anymore. Plus I found it mildly amusing that you seemed to be a baby-phobe. Ok that child was highly annoying but she was cute. I think the grimace you made when she smiled and waved saying hi was priceless.


Jen said...

I think the voice is natural with some gay men. I remember a kid in high-school who hadn't admitted/didn't know he was gay and he always spoke with a very feminine voice.

Fogspinner said...

I'm not sure it's the feminine voice that makes me cringe, I know a couple straight men with voices that could peel paint, but the added S's and Th's and pffthtt's in words that I can't even begin to copy into type.

Anonymous said...

I think its an affectation; part they do it on purpose and part they do it because most of the people they are around talk like that.
It's like when you go somewhere that people have an accent, you pretty quickly have an accent, too.